I'm obsessed with being obsessed

So I'm sitting here looking into the jumbled mess of shoes that is my closet.... And it's really getting on my nerves.... I moved from a house with a decent shoe rack... Maybe not high class hoity toity but it was functional and I liked it pretty well.... And I moved into a shitbox apartment because I thought J was coming home and we'd be able to jump right back into either my grandfathers foreclosed upon home (where I'd been living) or into a new one... And then.. Well you know... Lets not fucking dwell in that pile of woe-is-me ok??

So I didn't get a house.... Yet.... So my poor babies are at the bottom of... I guess you'd call it a closet.... My clothes hang there..... And there's supposedly room at the bottom for... I dunno... I guess people put their shoes there... Anyhow.... My shoes are there... At the bottom of this.... Space... And their all jumbled and commingling and like hanging out... Some on the left side and some on the right... And some fucking like roaming away from each other..... 

"Oh you wanna wear that red ribbon tie strappy sandal??? Too fucking bad!!! HaHA! Here's the left shoe.... Go fuck yourself on the right one"

So I can't find a matching pair to save my soul... Which really irks me... As my shit was always color coded and quite obsessively neat.

.... So I'm looking... And I WANT to do something about this... I do... But I just don't have the room to move my babies where they need to be.... So I obsess about not being able to obsessively display my whares..... I'm obsessing about the fact that I obsess over obsessing.... See the spiral?????

Pretty much my options are: get rid of some shoes (likelihood of that happening: 0.0000000000000000000000000000000001%)

Put shoes back into a box and just wait it out (yea right that would defeat the purpose of LOOKING at or for them)

So I am forced to go in on my hands and knees and root around like a cave woman... Things could be worse i suppose...

And I just bought a new pair.... Ok two new pair... Their still in the box because I don't want to just throw them in... And I don't want those ghetto target or Walmart shoe organizers either... Anyone who has their shoes on a door rack needs to be kicked in the shins and have their shoes taken away... And all of their shoes with laces tied together...

...... I'm gonna just have to suffer and let this mess go until J gets home.... I can't even close the "doors" (sliding monstrosity things) on them..... Because my shoes are spilling out in a desperate bid for freedom..

God help me.......