Clever little witch.........

Yaaayyy its shoe day.... Ok I've decided that "shoe day" will be any fucking day I remember that I enjoy shoes..... Or any day I have something particularly interesting to rant on n on about..... So yaaayyyy its shoe day!

And I'm at the fucking gym on a level 20 elliptical while I type this shit out... Listening to some awesome shit in my ear holes.... Who's a multi-tasking mutherfucker?????

Hey! Over here!

Let's get this shit started:

Are crafty? If you are, consider yourself lucky.... I have a friend who can make old shit look like it was always made to look the way it turns out when she's done.... Like she found this ugly ass end table.... Flipped it upside-down.... Raped it.... Painted it.... And now its an awesome dog bed.... I kinda envy her....... Mainly because I can't do half the shit she does..... My expertise lies in shoe acquisitions, my inability to have one conversation without a cuss word in it, my instant ability to cut you down to size (my rapier wit.... Hahaha "tell her I have a rapists wit"), and my baking skills (I'm like a pirate june cleaver.... Apron and all)

I recently got a new job..... And its working out pretty sweet.... Closer to where I live.... Better co-workers (for the moooooost part -ones an absolute douche) and its paperwork... and allot of checking and details and phones and all that jazz.... Which I enjoy because I can keep pace when shits going fast... But when needed I can calm down stuff pretty well.....

Anyhow.... The new job is like in the "country" and I...... Am not.... I haven't camped anywhere for any reason a day in my fabulous shoe filled life...... And I intend to keep it that way.... Especially since J has filled his "camping" quota for a lifetime thanks to his being a US Marine and all ;) so I don't have to worry about those "fake-cactions"

The POINT of me mentioning the country aspect of my job..... There are wild ass bunnies running around...... And I see em all the time and the only two things I think are;
A: "damn bunny fur is soooo soft and 'fwuffy'"... I remember when my mom bought me a pair of rabbit fur lined black gloves when I was like 4..... I LOVED them... I wore those shits OUT children..... And I've wanted something as soft ever since..... Hence ("yea... HENCE") my love of all things fur and fur related..... Now I'm not talking of the bullshit nasty ass fruity "plushie" obsessed..... I'm talking straight up cruella DeVille infatuation..... Which my grandmother fed by telling me that the silver fox stole was mine when she passed away since I was the one who wore it at every given opportunity and "formal" (thank you Grandma Tommy.... You may have UFC fighting skills.... But I enjoyed ya)
B: (yea I'm still simi on topic) "I wonder how long itd take to catch one...... And kill it......."

Yep.... I want to catch a thumper just so I can...... "Undress" him/her.......... And then when the hide is all proper (see this is where I'd need help..... I dunno how to preserve the hide appropriately without making a hot bloody/matted mess) I want to cut pretty decent strips..... And place them on the back of a hot pair of sling backs!!!!

Tell me you've seen the same fur accented christian loubontin heels I have!!!!!

My my my my MY..... I do love them I do I do I dooooo.....

I just don't want shit so "feathery" like those tho..... So I want like a nice black or white rabbit fur accent to the back..... Or a tasteful "wafer" of rabbit fur on the toe of the shoe.... Like a sweet wafer of fur over the peep of a peep toe.... Thatd be sweet....

But alas...... I am not crafty/martha stewawrtly gifted enough to pull something like that off..... I can sit in silence for 5 minutes visualizing my mother in a kitchen cooking most anything.... And have a pretty decent recipe form in my head to replicate the things she made...... (Tho I have yet dared to create her grandmothers fried chicken (I don't like chicken on the bone.... And I don't like chicken with skin on it..... And I'm not really that sweet at frying shit yet)) but I cannot make THINGS..... Oh I try.... But I don't have an artsy/crafty bone in my body.....and I have even less patience for shit when it like needs time to do anything other than rise (so like "drying" "setting" or in any way having to be made in steps and I'm not gonna get to eat it or feed it to someone afterwards....) Is Pretty much out.... But hey..... If you have a decent set of heels and a hot glue gun and  YOU wanna spruce em up some.... I fucking salute you soldier! And I wish you god's speed!

I think my ultimate lust in life -other than a dream of  being a shoe BUYER for like a neimans, bloomies, nordstroms...... Or even a high end macys.....  Would be to DESIGN shoes.... And have a whole slough of.... Ahem..... "Reasonably priced" labor make them..... Or hell a crap load of fashion design interns..... I mean I understand the basic ABCs..... I just can't sketch what's in my head..... At least not Very well.... But I have the superpowers of being well spoken and quite verbose... (Natch) and I think I could get my point of view across well.... And I'm sure I could learn the actualities of construction and then have an even more hands-on approach to the process..... God that would rock..... I enjoy the changing nature of the fashion industry (including shoes and accessories) but I love that something can also come across as really "classic" and able to be versatile at the same time... It can be worn for years...

I have so many ideas going through my head... Once J comes home I might go back to school once we're pregnant and take a few fashion design courses for research.... Maybe it will give me an introduction to the important "construction" basics I lack...... At any rate it would save J money eventually if I am able to make the shoes I constantly visualize, search for, "kinda" see in the stores... And then hardly wear because they weren't "what I thought they'd be" and they didn't scratch that itch of need......

Being able to make my own shoes would send me to a whole orgasmic level of shoe love! LET'S DO IT!!!!!!

I'll have to do some (lots) of research.... And we may have to buy a house in a more...... Fashion friendly yet industrial..... Area of california (hello San Francisco!!! Mamas coming HOME)

Hmm..... I am going to devote my life (well I'll devote my weekend) to seeing how I can bring this all about..... Damn I may be crafty yet...... By crafty I mean manipulative and the owner of a man who's single goal in life is to make me happy.......... Kidding.....................

















Kinda....................